Tell It like It Is.....: I hate working....

In my whole life, I have only held one other full time job before this one. It was in a bar doing various things from tray service to gaming manager. All the other jobs I held have been in a part time capacity.
I don't think that I am cut out for full time work, I think I am better suited to part time, going to uni or just plain old unemployed status. I find that working full time encroaches on my time. It encroaches on my sleep time, my shopping time, my pinball time, my reading time, my watching TV time, my watching movie time, my internet surfing time, my listening to music time, my eating time, my drinking time, and most importantly my getting sex time. How the hell am I supposed to fit all of these things into a day when I have to be at work for 9.5hs+ per day? Besides all those things that I want to do, what about all those things that I have to do? Like washing my clothes, dyeing my hair, shaving my legs, cleaning up my room, cooking, painting my fingernails, and smoking cigarettes.
I think I was better off when I was a bum, on the unemployment line, scraping up every cent to buy my next packet of cigarettes and 6 pack of beer. At least then I wasn't stressed out about WORK!!!!
If only I could come to work, do my shit, and then go home and forget about it. Oh no, doesn't work like that, I am supposed to CARE!!!!! I am getting stressed out mostly because I won't say that I don't care, I don't care if the business goes down the gurgler, I don't care if I don't have a job tomorrow. I've been there before and I have survived.
I just wish that I could go back to a job where all I had to do was show up dressed fine, remember a few songs, drink a few beers, and then go out and party until dawn. What a life.....my biggest worry then was what new song to learn for the week. My biggest worry now is how to avoid the boss and do anything that resembles work for as long as I can possibly get away with. And getting that right is hard work.
What I am supposed to do isn't hard, it isn't time consuming, it isn't even enough work for a 40 hour week, but the fact that I have to stretch it out and make it look hard and time consuming is becoming harder with every week.
I want to go home now and do nothing for the next 12 hours until I have to come back here and surf the net for a few hours. It seems like a good idea....

I had the strangest dream......

Last night my cute IT guy stayed over (he makes me smile), and I had a weird dream. We watched "Night of the Living Dead" (original B&W) in bed, and then I put on another dvd and went to sleep. I think MCITG watched it for half an hour after I went to sleep, and then turned it off. It's a strange thing when you first start hanging out with someone and your supposed to want to jump their bones all the time - and I do want to jump his bones all of the time - but you find yourself falling asleep before the act because you're just too tired. It was OK because we woke up in the middle of the night...umm, I'll stop now.
But, as I was explaining, this strange dream......
I was in bed watching a dvd with MCITG, and we were cuddling and stuff, when I noticed an advertisement pop up in the corner of the screen - like when pop ups occur on your computer - and I realised that it was a video of me having sex with an ex. It was so vivid that I saw the camera being adjusted at the beginning to make sure that the angle, focus and lighting were right. There was a caption on the screen saying where the movie had been shot and by whom. And, make no mistake, I am totally identifiable with the tattoos that I have so I know that it was of me.
It wasn't my last ex though, it was one a couple before him, and the person that was supposed to have shot it was an aquaintance of my last ex.
I saw this movie-thing on the screen and I panicked. How did they get it? Why were they showing it now? What do I do?
I first tried to move so MCITG wouldn't be able to see the TV, that didn't work. He says "Hey, isn't that you?", and of course I say something totally believable like "Where, there? On the TV, no couldn't be...well... "
I mean, exactly what am I going to say? "Of course that's not me, lots of women have tattoos of the exact same hand drawn dragon tattoo that I have on my upper thigh." Yeah, right!
I don't remember where it went from there exactly, but what is going on in my head for me to have this dream? To my knowledge there are no videos out there of me having sex.
Am I trying to sabotage this really nice liaison somehow?
This is all way too disturbing, I need to meditate on the whole dream meaning thing for a while.

My Hero.....And I met him in person

I finally got to meet Ian in person last night, and you know what? He didn't look anything like I expected, he was as funny as I expected, we have a fair bit in common, and he is full of.......... trivia.
We came third in the Trash Trivia game and I got to take home a poster for our efforts. We really need to study up on those music questions. I let the side down severely with those. It was so much fun though, I hope that we can make it a regular thing. I want to do karaoke next, at least I can get up and do the team proud then. Maybe we can do some more really cool things, like we could do paintball, or go karts, or go camping for a weekend, or take a balloon ride. I am really fantasising here but, you get the general idea. I made a real live friend(there's echoes of Pinocchio there I'm sure). I hope that he will want to hang out with me sometime.
It's a strange thing when you build a picture of someone in your head and then meet them. The whole of last year I dealt with people on the phone up to four or five times a week, when we had our christmas party, I finally got to meet some of them. I had that whole picture thing in my head for most of them, and was (sometimes disappointingly so) suprised to find that the faces didn't match my picture.
One the guys in the office had it all figured out, we are Charlie from Charlie's Angels.
We make the call,
Charlie, "So, we have a job for you, can you take on the assignment?"
Candidate/Angel, "Sure, what, when, who?"
Charlie, "Here is the assignment, it needs to be done with speed, accuracy and above all, to schedule, we will contact you when you're underway."
Candidate/Angel, "Fine, I'll send the documents through when I've completed the job".
The whole job can be completed, the candidate paid and the client invoiced, all without us having left the comfort of our office. This happens several times a day, with several different clients and candidates. As many of the clients have been with the company longer than me, and too, most of the candidates, I haven't had the opportunity to meet with them. We are literally, the voice on the phone.
Well, really should be working now, damn.

My Hero (sigh)

Tonight I get to meet a hero. A hero of many people around the world, and he became mine by enthralling me with his words.
This fellow blogger has been posting for quite sometime now, and I can only hope to poorly emulate his interesting and articulate blogs about his lifes' experiences.
As the day slowly ends, and the meeting time becomes closer, I am getting more nervous, I mean how does one act around a hero?
I will have to let youknow how it all goes tomorrow, but I am really excited.